Most parents with disabilities agree that when they decided to have children they did consider whether having to use a wheelchair would allow them to be autonomous enough to care for them in their early years or how they would overcome certain obstacles brought about by their injury. However, these minor doubts did not determine their decision, given that their desire to be parents was always above any other consideration.
It is true, however, that "on some specific occasions I have needed support", acknowledges Iñaki (father of Jon, aged eight). Similarly, Pepa (the mother of two three year-old and six-month old girls) tells us that "you need help from other people sometimes, such as when my girl started to walk and the neighbours in my area helped her take her first steps because it was very difficult for me". Javier (the father of six-year-old twins), however, says that he does "almost everything the same as a person without disabilities, except for some physical sports, of course".
«Most parents with disabilities agree that when they decided to have children they did consider whether having to use a wheelchair would allow them to be autonomous enough to care for them in their early years.»
Another important aspect for any couple, not only for those where one of the members is a wheelchair user, is how you distribute the workload. Kity and Joan (parents of two children of four and five months, respectively) delegate most of the work related with their children to their partners while they take care of the housework. Javier takes care of his twins nights and weekends, whereas Pepa looks after her girls with the help of a part-time child-minder and her partner.
Lastly, Iñaki takes care of most tasks related with his son, as his wife spends more hours away from home. What he finds hardest is to "set limits". What he enjoys the most is taking him to school, helping him with his homework, taking him to football matches and, especially, "answering the thousands of questions Jon is starting to ask me about the things he likes". And in order to do all this he always takes his Batec with him. "Jon endearingly calls it "Batetxu" (little Batec) and whenever we go out he reminds me I have to take it. He loves climbing onto my legs. Even his friends, when they see us go by, want to climb up too. Also, thanks to the Batec I can go cycling with him, his friends and their parents. When I get angry with Jon, the worse threat I can use is "I won't take you on the Batetxu anymore".
«Another important aspect for any couple, not only for those where one of the members is a wheelchair user, is how you distribute the workload.»
Joan loves carrying his son in her arms and making him laugh, but what he really enjoys is bath time. For Kity, the best moment is feeding time and watching him sleep on his lap. Or even changing his nappy! What Javier enjoys most "is Saturday and Sunday mornings when they get up and come to bed to watch cartoons. And the hardest part is when I'm very tired and they continue to be full of energy. Especially when they won't let me take a nap at the weekend...".
Javier tells us how much he enjoys it when "they get up on Sunday morning and come into bed to watch cartoons". He also enjoys going with them with the Batec when they are cycling or skating. They also enjoy climbing on their father and they even "ask me if they can drive the Batec". Pepa loves taking Adela to school and Joan takes his baby for walks in the pushchair with his wheelchair and the Batec. "The look on people's faces when they see us is priceless".
«Ana recognises that "the Batec was a great help in the first months because it allowed me to push my son and have one hand free so that I could care for him.»
In fact, Ana recognises that "the Batec was a great help in the first months because it allowed me to push my son and have one hand free so that I could care for him. Later, it has allowed me to make long trips, and saved me from having to take the car". Kity says that for him the main role of the Batec is to "reduce the workload for my wife. It also helps along sharp slopes or uneven terrain, as well as making me feel safer when I carry Fran with me in the carrier. What is more, I know that in the future I'll be able to follow my son around in the park with the wheelchair and the Batec".
We could not end this post without sharing with you a few tips for disabled people considering becoming parents: "Take risks, children are clever and adapt to every situation and bring lots of things to your life!". After all, "parenthood is priceless: it is always rewarding".